Its Friday, our kids finished quarantine homeschool this week (HOORAY!), and we have a fun new food-TV recommendation for you: “Amy Schumer Learns To Cook”.  Who else follows @amyschumer on Instagram? Anyone else been obsessively saving the recipes that Amy Schumer has been posting during quarantine from her new show “Amy Schumer Learns To Cook”? Oh, just me? And, spoiler alert, all the “Amy Schumer Learns To Cook” recipes have been posted on the Food Network’s site linked here. 

Amy Schumer has produced a fun new show live from quarantine for the Food Network with her chef husband Chris Fischer. Each episode of “Amy Schumer Learns To Cook” starts with Amy making a cocktail (apparently Amy worked as bartender before making it in Hollywood) and continues with Chris cooking while Amy cracks jokes and occasionally acts as a sous chef. Amy’s banter includes frequent complaints about her husband Chris’ over use of fennel and onions and her own lack of personal hygiene during quarantine (showers are overrated!). If you enjoy Amy Schumer’s humor and food-related programming, we highly recommend you watch this new Food Network show. Her chicken wings are next on my list of recipes to try.

Maybe I love the show because my husband Ryan and I both enjoy cooking and sometimes we like cooking together. Although my precise measuring and recipe following drives him crazy and Ryan’s incessant need to add crushed chili pepper flakes to everything and the fact that his dicing looks more like cubing…I digress. 

Below are the two cocktails and two meals we have made thus far from “Amy Schumer Learns To Cook”. We highly recommend both Amy Schumer cocktails that Mallory and I first made during our future sister-in-law Betsy’s Lake Chelan bachelorette party. The Paloma, I Don’t Even Know Ya was the group favorite described as an elevated, more sophisticated version of spodie. And, apparently the leftover tequila-soaked pineapple can be made into great shots (make sure to privately message Mallory about that recipe)! The Tinto de Verano, which translates into “red wine of summer” is a great alternative to sangria – it does not have to soak for hours and is not overly sweet. Both are great summer drink options if you are looking to bring some variety to your cocktail game. 

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Paloma, I Don’t Even Know Ya

 Ingredients

Tequila-Soaked Pineapple:

• 1 pineapple, peeled, cored and cut into cubes
• Half of a 750-milliliter bottle tequila

Cocktail:

• 3 ounces sparkling water
• 2 ounces of tequila from the tequila-soaked pineapple
• Muddled pineapple from the tequila-soaked pineapple
• A splash fresh grapefruit juice
• Slice of grapefruit, blood orange or pineapple, for garnish, optional

Directions

1. For the tequila-soaked pineapple: Put the pineapple in a large resealable container and pour the tequila over it. Refrigerate for at least 8 hours.
2. For the cocktail: Put ice in a rocks glass and add 2 ounces of the tequila from the tequila-soaked pineapple. Top with the sparkling water and a splash of grapefruit juice. In a separate glass, coarsely muddle a piece of the pineapple, then add to the rocks glass. Garnish with a slice of grapefruit, blood orange or pineapple if desired.

Recipe Credit: Food Network

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Tinto de Verano

Ingredients

• Half of a 750-milliliter bottle of your favorite inexpensive red wine
• 16 ounces sparkling water (or 7-Up/Sprite if you want your drink a little sweeter)
• 2 ounces sweet vermouth
• Juice of 1 lemon plus lemon slices for garnish
• Juice of 1 orange plus orange slices for garnish

Directions

1. Fill a pitcher with ice halfway, then add the red wine, sparkling water (or 7-Up/Sprite), vermouth if using, lemon juice and orange juice. Garnish with lemon slices, orange slices or whatever you want.

Recipe Credit: Food Network

After having success with Amy Schumer’s Paloma, I Don’t Even Know Ya and Tinto de Verano cocktails, Ryan and I made two of “Amy Schumer Learns To Cook” food recipes. The first, this broccoli pasta, was very good. We would, however, suggest cutting out the added cauliflower. Its an extra step, extra pan, and frankly did not add much additional flavor. We also added cubed chicken to the pasta because Ryan struggles to call anything a meal that doesn’t include meat. And Ryan would also suggest adding copious amounts of crushed red chili pepper flakes. We have modified the recipe below to reflect our recommendation, but the original is also linked. We will be making this broccoli pasta again – a delicious way to consume a lot of greens!

Broccoli Pasta

Ingredients

• Kosher salt
• 2 chicken breasts, cooked and cubed
• 1 pound dried spaghetti (I used penne)
• 2 pounds broccoli (about 2 heads, depending on the size), florets separated from the stems, stems peeled if really thick
• 1 onion, minced
• 1 tablespoon unsalted butter
• 1/2 lemon
• 1/4 cup + 2 tablespoons olive oil
• 4 cloves garlic, minced
• 3 ounces freshly grated Parmesan cheese
• Red crushed chili pepper flakes (to taste)

Directions

1. Before making your pasta, cook two chicken breasts (sprinkle with salt and pepper prior to cooking) in your Instant Pot (I used Manual Setting for 16 minutes). Once chicken is cooked, remove from Instant Pot and cube.
2. Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil. When the water is boiling vigorously, add the pasta and cook according to the directions on the package. Reserve some of the pasta cooking water, then drain the pasta in a colander and set aside.
3. Meanwhile, bring about 1 1/2 inches of water to a boil in a small pot. Chop the broccoli stems and add them to the boiling water along with about a quarter of the broccoli florets and the onions. Cook until very soft, about 10 minutes, then turn off the heat and add the butter and a hearty amount of salt. Cover with a lid to cool, about 15 minutes.
4. When cool, transfer the contents of the pot to a blender, add the juice from the lemon half and puree until very smooth. Check the seasoning and add salt as necessary.
5. Heat a large sauté pans over high heat and add 2 tablespoons of olive oil. Sauté the remaining broccoli florets in the pan, tossing every couple minutes, for about 10 minutes total or until the broccoli has color and is starting to soften and break apart. Add the garlic to the pan, crushed red chili pepper flakes (to taste) and toss well, cooking another few minutes or until the broccoli is just cooked through.
6. Remove from the heat. Stir in the pureed broccoli, cubed chicken, extra olive oil to taste and the pasta. Turn the heat back on and heat everything up, tossing together well and adding a little reserved pasta water if needed to loosen the sauce, until well coated. Serve topped with a healthy amount of freshly grated Parmesan cheese. 

Recipe Credit: Food Network

Ryan and I also made Jennifer Lawrence’s Roast Chicken with Shallot Fried Rice. Amy Schumer posted this recipe to her Instagram account (@amyschumer) but she never actually makes it on her show. Instead, during her “Amy Schumer Learns To Cook” episode on pasta, Amy calls Jennifer Lawrence while she is waxing poetic on the outstanding qualities of oaky chardonnay. During the phone call, Jennifer Lawrence outlines her method for cooking roast chicken. I love Jennifer Lawrence as an actress so admittedly I was excited about making her roast chicken and followed her recipe to a T (as Ryan would tell you I have the annoying habit of doing). 

Do not make my same mistake! The recipe calls for WAY TOO MUCH olive oil, butter and wine. When the chicken finally reached the correct internal temperature (after baking well over an hour and still not browning like I wanted) and we took it out of the oven to rest, we proceeded to spill hot oil all over kitchen. Once combined with spinach (which we swapped in for recipe’s suggested arugula), the chicken tasted fine but was nothing exciting and definitely not worth the trouble of cleaning up the spilt oil. I did not modify the recipe below but consider yourself warned. If I were to make it again, I would cut the olive oil, butter and wine down considerably, perhaps to only a quarter of the recipe’s suggested amount. 

Instead, I recommend you save yourself the trouble and pick-up one of Costco’s rotisserie chickens for $4.99 or (for about three times the cost of Costco) one of PCC’s organic roast chickens and serve it with Jennifer Lawrence’s shallot fried rice recipe, which was very good and even worth having to dice five shallots! And, Ryan, that’s dice not cube. 

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Jennifer Lawrence’s Roast Chicken with Shallot Fried Rice

Ingredients

Chicken:

• 1 whole chicken (about 3 pounds)
• 2 cups olive oil 
• 1 1/2 sticks (12 tablespoons) unsalted butter, softened and cut into pieces
• Kosher salt 
• 1 onion, halved
• 1 lemon, halved
• 12 sprigs thyme 
• 2 cups dry white wine 
• 6 ounces baby arugula (I used spinach instead of arugula)

Shallot Fried Rice:

• 1 cup white rice (I used half white rice and half brown rice)
• Olive oil, for the pan
• 5 shallots, minced
• Kosher salt
• 1 pound shiitake mushrooms, coarsely chopped (I only used ¾ pound because shiitake mushrooms were expensive at the grocery store!)

Directions

1. For the chicken: Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F.
2. Dry off the chicken well with paper towels. Put it in a roasting pan and massage with some of the oil, some of the butter and 2 tablespoons salt. 
3. Add the onion halves to the pan, drizzle in the remaining oil and sprinkle with some salt. Add the remaining butter to the pan. Squeeze the juice from the lemon halves over the chicken and into the pan, then place the lemon halves in the cavity of the chicken along with the thyme sprigs. Add the white wine to the pan. 
4. Put the chicken in the oven, reduce the temperature to 350 degrees F and roast, basting halfway with the pan juices, until the thickest part of the chicken measures 160 degrees F, about 1 hour. Allow to rest 20 minutes before carving. 
5. For the shallot fried rice: Put the rice in a medium saucepan with 2 cups water and bring to a simmer over medium-high heat. Cover the pan, reduce the heat to low and cook until the water is absorbed and the rice is tender, about 20 minutes. Let stand, covered, for 10 minutes.
6. Meanwhile, heat some oil in a sauté pan over medium heat until it begins to shimmer. Add the shallots and cook, stirring, until browned, about 7 minutes. Transfer the shallots to a plate or bowl using a slotted spoon and sprinkle with a generous amount of salt (use a lot because the shallots will be the “salt” for your rice). Add the mushrooms to the remaining oil in the pan and cook, stirring occasionally, until browned. 
7. Mix together the rice, mushrooms and shallots in a serving bowl. Serve the chicken tossed with the arugula along with the shallot fried rice. 

Recipe Credit: Food Network

TGIF everyone! Let us know if you watch an episode of “Amy Schumer Learns To Cook” on the Food Network or make one of her recipes. We would love to hear what you think.